A Fractured Mind
by Serry2
Summary: THE BEST ONESHOT EVER!maybe. What if Ryuichi's personality changes were signs of something darker in the cute little singer's past? Look into the past of a broken angel and you get A Fractured Mind. K to be safe


If I owned Gravitation then there would be at least another season of story and songs out by now.

Hey all! I don't know all that much about this disorder but I thought that it would make for an interesting story, from the sound of it. It certainly would answer a few questions.

What if Ryuichi's personality changes were signs of something darker in the cute little singer's past? Look into the past of a broken angel and you get:

A Fractured Mind

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"I'm telling you, that's just not normal!" cried Yamanaka-san. The producer of the famous hit band, Nittle Grasper, was currently attempting to rip out all of his hair in frustration. The object of his frustration, meanwhile, was playing in the corner with his favorite companion, Kumagoro. The band was currently working on the last track of their new album and the lead singer and lyricist, Sakuma Ryuichi, had just called for a break because Kumagoro was getting lonely. Tohma and Noriko had gratefully sunk onto a nearby couch and K had turned aside to polish his beloved Magnum but Yamanaka-san had immediately protested. "He was just singing with a concentration that I've only seen in the greats but now he's like a four year old. It's almost like he's two different people." Tohma just gave his trademark smile and shrugged casually.

"One would think you would be used to our little Ryu-chan's ways by now Yamanaka-san. You have, afterall, lasted far longer then any of our other producers." He understood that while Ryuichi could have gone on for days, as a professional, he had seen the exhaustion in his band members' stances and had picked up on the near-stumble that Noriko had made in the third measure. Everything that Ryuichi did served a purpose, even if no one else picked up on that and his band had long ago learned to have infinite patience with him. Tohma allowed his head to fall back again as he listened to his producer rant on.

"I shouldn't have to see how long I last!" continued Yamanaka. "No sane human acts like..." Tohma's head rose again as Yamanaka's words trailed off. "That's it," he said suddenly, "the boy's not sane. Think of the damaging impact that this may have on the group. We'll need to find some way to control this. If the press gets a hold of any of this all of our careers could be over. Perhaps we should secretly start looking for a different vocal..." The sound of gunfire rang out and Yamanaka immediately ducked down and stared at K in confusion. He was more then used to the crazy American manager drawing his weapons but he had never had one drawn on him. Now, however, there was a noticable hole in the wall millimeters from where his head had been a moment ago. The producer frowned and drew himself up to yell at the man but stopped short when he noticed the dangerous expression in the man's eyes.

"Yamanaka-san, arigatou for all of your hard work on Nittle Grasper but I'm afraid that we will no longer be requiring your presence on our team. Please see the Sachou for a new assignment." Yamanaka began to protest but K only cut him off again. "I understand your frustration with this decision but we feel that it is for the best. Comply quietly and I'll see that you are given a good opening within the company. Make any move to go public and I'll see to it that the information of your infidelity in Kyoto is leaked to the press. Now I do understand that you may have been drunk but this company does have strict ethical codes that may have a problem with that encounter. Not to mention the reaction of your lovely wife." Yamanaka paled and silently left the room. K sighed and put the Magnum away.

"And another on bites the dust," came a velvet voice, speaking in heavy English, from behind him. K turned, not at all shocked to find who was speaking. Behind him stood Ryuichi, holding Kumagoro in one loose but protective hand, with a deep and serious look. He continued on in Japanese. "This one took longer then the others but he came much closer as well. You really had to dig deep to find anything you could hold over him for silence, as opposed to the others."

"Indeed," said Tohma as he stood. "It is clear that something must be done. Perhaps I should step in as Producer full time, instead of just as a fill-in between producers. Ryuichi shook his head slowly.

"Its not that I don't appreciate everything that's gone into protecting me but K and I have been talking and..." he trailed off uncertianly. K sighed and stepped in.

"As Nittle Grasper, the band under the contract of SoundExplosion Studios, your contracts will be set to expire after the release of your next album and promotional tour. The Sachou has expressed a great interest in renewing the contract. However, we believe that it may be for the best if we bring the contract to a close and break Nittle Grasper."

"Nani!" screamed Tohma and Noriko.

"Its really for the best," assured Ryuichi quietly. "Tohma, I know that you've been secretly desiring to open your own label and to stay home with Mika-san more. Noriko, I also know that you and your husband have been talking about having a baby for a while now and this would be your chance to do so. Don't ask me how I know: I also have my sources. This would not only give you the chance to fulfill those dreams but it would also allow for me to go seek treatment." Tohma and Noriko blinked at him in confusion and K took the moment to step in.

"We have decided that Nittle Grasper will announce its break-up tour after the release of the next album and when the contract expires I will escort Ryuichi to America. There, under the guise of a three-year solo tour, Ryuichi will seek treatment for his condition from a specialist. Whether or not the treatment is successful, we will return after three years and see where we go from there."

"Treatment," mumbled Noriko? "Ryuichi, you barely talk about it to Kumagoro. Are you sure that you're ready to speak to some foreign stranger about it?" Ryuichi nodded and thought back to the events that had shaped him.

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FLASHBACK

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A twelve-year-old boy huddled in fear as the woman above him kept spewing vile words and raining blows on his smaller-than-average body. The boy had been singing along to a music video that he had been watching on the television and his mother had come home early to find him caught up in the energy of the rock and roll piece. The boy's house had strict rules about what could be viewed on the television, which consisted of the cooking channel and the religious channel that his mother was devout to. When the boy's father had walked out on them she had turned to that as her only solace and resolved that her, then three year old, son would be brought up in only those views so that he would never leave her. Any deviation from those plans by her son caused her to go into long sessions of physical punishment, which she would say were used to 'beat the devil out of him'. This would be followed by her gathering him close and treating him like a china doll, saying that she only did it because she loved him. Such beatings happened on an almost daily basis now and no one ever found out because he was home schooled. Finally, the woman's blows came to an end and she gathered the broken boy into her arms. "Oh Ryu-chan, I wish I didn't have to punish you but you know that mommy only does it so that you'll be a good boy right?"

The confusion and pain in Ryuichi's mind only increased as her hug stressed the already broken arm that was crushed in her grip. Ryuichi tried to push out all of the pain and horror that he felt but he felt as though it was going to drive him mad. He could literally feel his mind breaking and made one last-ditch effort to control the chaos in his mind. Even later, he would not be able to explain what occured but it was almost as if his mind was splitting in two. "Its alright na no da," whispered a voice in his mind. "I'll be here for you. Just rest now na no da." Ryuichi relaxed slowly and did not even notice when a child like voice emerged from his mouth and promised his mommy that he would be a good little boy from now on. His mother, a nurse at Tokyo General Hospital, smiled at her little angel and began to treat his wounds with the medical supplies that she snuck home from work. Ryuichi fell into a tired sleep and did not even fight as the new awareness in him continued providing the answers that their mother wanted to hear.

After a month with the new awareness, which insisted on being called Ryu-chan, Ryuichi was more than adjusted to his new life. On some level he was aware that this new development was not normal but, for a boy who had no friends and who was almost never allowed out, this new voice to speak to was a welcome change. They would play while his mother was away at work and Ryu-chan would help to protect him once she came back. He would bake angel shaped cookies that Ryu-chan would proceed to munch with childish joy and when his mother went to punish him for spoiling his dinner Ryu-chan would come out and, in his most pathetic four-year-old voice, tell her that he had only wanted to give her angels when she came home since she had to be an angle. She had immediately melted and had only punished him by denying him dinner that night. Ryuichi was more than used to being denied meals and had happily complied. Thanks to Ryu-chan, beatings were down to only one or two a week and though he was missing more dinners he was happier then he could remember being.

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It was a quiet Tuesday morning and normally on this day Ryuichi would vacuum the house before sneaking in some more music videos. Ryu-chan would chant that Ryuichi was pika pika when he sang and that became his new favorite word. On this day, however, Ryuichi could be found on the floor of the living room, unable to move from his latest beating. He had been having toast with his mother that morning and Ryu-chan had said that he should put cream cheese and strawberry jam on the toast. When Ryuichi had replied that that would probably be a nasty combination his mother had dropped her teacup and stared at him with large eyes. It was then that he realized that he and Ryu-chan had both been speaking aloud. His mother had called him possessed and had beaten him severely before leaving for work.

Ryuichi tried to lift himself again and belatedly realized that his arm, still weak from the last break, had broken once again. The pain in his chest also indicated that he probably had some broken ribs. The cuts on his back had calmed to just trickles of blood and his legs were probably only bruised at most. Ryu-chan crooned to him at the back of his mind but Ryuichi refused to let his friend come out for a while as it would only serve for both of them feeling the pain. Ryuichi finally decided to just lay there and wait for his mother to come back on her lunch break and help him and she usually did when she beat him in the mornings. At least one good thing about being beaten in the mornings was that she usually stole painkillers to give to him instead of making him wait for the next day to give it to him. Ryuichi waited in pain but her lunchtime came and went with no appearance.

"Mommy's really mad this time, na no da," said Ryu-chan worriedly. "Do you think that she'll just let us die?"

"No," responded Ryuichi. "She probably just got asked to assist in a long surgery and couldn't come back. We'll just tell her that it was a game and she'll patch us up." Ryu-chan nodded and retreated to the back of his mind again, giving Ryuichi sole possession of movement. They kept waiting and around three o'clock the door opened quietly. Ryuichi was about to call out when he realized that it was not his mother's voice he heard speaking at the door but two men. Ryuichi watched helplessly as they entered the tiny home.

"Its says on her papers that she has a son that lives with her. At the very least he should see her before...In any case, try not to startle him. It says here that his name is Ryuichi and he is very shy of people. That's apparently why she gives him all of his check-ups," said the man in a brown suit.

"Or not," replied the other man, who was obviously a police officer, as he laid eyes on him.

"Good heavens," cried the first man as he ran up to Ryuichi. He pulled a stethoscope out of his pocket and began looking over the boy.

"Nothing seems missing or out of place," remarked the officer, "so this doesn't look like a botched robbery attempt. Are you Ryuichi? Can you tell me what happened to you?" Ryuichi nodded slowly.

"Mommy said that I was bad so I had to be punished." The man checking him froze for a moment before resuming his work much slower.

"I never would have thought this of her," he remarked tiredly. "I'm Doctor Mitsukage," he told Ryuichi sadly. "I work with your mommy in the hospital. I'll make sure that you're taken care of." Ryuichi nodded and allowed himself to finally pass out. Dr. Mitsukage turned to the officer." He can be moved but I don't think that it would be a good idea to wait for an ambulance. I believe that most of them are on that pile up on the other side of the city."

"I'll take you both in the back of my cruiser. We'll have to leave your car here," replied the officer. Dr. Mitsukage only nodded and gently lifted the boy up into his arms, wincing at how light he was.

"Damn you, Nami," he thought to himself. "To do this to a child. I really didn't know you at all did I?"

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"Wakey, wakey na no da," came a gentle voice and Ryuichi snapped out of his morphine induced sleep. He looked around carefully and saw that he was alone in a hospital room.

"What happened Ryu-chan?" he asked softly.

"The nice doctor made you feel all better na no da. He'll be back soon and he said that we'd have a friend staying with us too. He likes to talk when he thinks we're asleep. He's silly, na no da." Ryuichi smiled and relaxed into the pillows. Moments later the doors swung open and Dr. Mitsukage came in giving him a funny look. He shook his head, as if to clear it, and approached the boy's bed quietly.

"Ryuichi," he said as he pulled up a chair, "I have some bad news. You remember how I came to your house to see you earlier? Well I came to tell you that your mother wasn't feeling to good. Ryuichi, your mother had an aneurysm this morning, which means that a blood vein in her brain got big and weak. It made her very sick right away. We did all that we could for her but your mommy did not make it. Your mommy died an hour ago Ryuichi." Ryuichi just blinked at him, not believing what he was hearing. Even if she beat him she was his mother. What would he do without her. Ryuichi started crying but as Dr. Mitsukage watched his face suddenly broke into a sad smile.

"It's okay, na no da. Mommy is with the angels now and so she'll be happy. It'll be okay, na no da. We'll still be pika pika." Dr. Mitsukage watched as the childlike voice came from Ryuichi's mouth. He understood that the voice was talking to Ryuichi and not to him. He stood slowly and put the chair back.

"Ryuichi, I want you to sleep some more, okay? Don't worry, I'll make sure that you are safe." Ryuichi nodded and closed his eyes obediently. Dr. Mitsukage walked quickly back to his office and cursed himself for not having more psychiatric books. True he was a surgeon but he still should have had at least the basics. He sat at his computer and booted it up. When it was ready he opened his browser and looked for a rare disorder that he had only heard about once in passing. If he was right then he may have an actual case here. "A here it is," he murmured. "MPD."

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Ryuichi was on the edge of falling asleep when the door swung open again and a nurse appeared wheeling in another bed with a blond boy about his age on it. "Okay," she said brightly, "this is your room Tohma-san. I want you to be a good boy and stay in that bed so you don't tear your stitches, okay? This will be your roommate, Sakuma Ryuichi. Both of you behave," she ordered gently and walked out of the room. Ryuichi turned to regard his new roommate with interest. This was the first time, after all, that he was meeting someone his age. The boy gave him a bright smile.

"Hi, I'm Tohma and I just got my appendix out yesterday. What are you in for?" Ryuichi hesitated and so Ryu-chan came forward to answer.

"Mommy said that I was bad so she had to punish me but mommy died and so she couldn't fix me so Dr. Mitsukage fixed me, na no da." Tohma blinked for a moment and then smiled reassuringly.

"So long as you're fixed," he said oddly. Ryu-chan nodded and immediately decided that he liked this boy. He was pika pika.

"Hey lets color," he said and pulled some crayons from the drawer next to him. He sang happily as Tohma did the same and they both spent the rest of the afternoon playing from their separate beds. Ryuichi found out that Tohma's father was a successful businessman and that his mother worked in the hospital as a psychiatrist. This accounted for why he could understand human behavior so well and always wore a smile. He also had an aunt, uncle, and younger cousin but no siblings. At lunch he traded Ryu-chan his pudding cup for Ryu-chan's broccoli and ended up earning a friend for life. Later in the day Tohma's aunt visited him and gave him a bunch of presents, including a pink plushy bunny with a red bow tie. Tohma waited until she left and gave the bunny to Ryuichi.

"She still thinks that I like bunnies because they were all over my room when I was a baby," he explained. "You can have Mr. Bunny since I'm sure that you'll give him a better home then I could."

"Honto," asked Ryu-chan happily? "That's not a good name. I know. I'll call you Kumagoro, na no da!" he announced as he happily played with his first present ever. Tohma only smiled knowingly and suggested that Kumagoro may want to color as well. Ryu-chan squealed and pulled out his crayons again.

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Two days later it was time for Tohma to go home and Ryu-chan was crying at the thought of his friend leaving him and practically strangling Kumagoro. "Don't worry," said Tohma lightly. "I'm sure that I'll be able to come back and visit." Ryu-chan sniffed and gave a watery smile before retreating. Ryuichi blinked the tears away and placed Kumagoro carefully onto his lap.

"I'll be out of here soon as well, once Dr. Mitsukage finds a home to place me in. I hope that we can remain friends afterwards."

"Count on it," said Tohma, not even fazed by the sudden change. After two days together he was well used to his friend's strange ways. "Once you get out I'll take you to meet Noriko-chan. She's the one that I said has been showing me how to play the synth instead of the piano. Maybe we can all start a band together since you like to sing so much. Take care of Kumagoro. I'll write to you soon."

"No you won't," came a voice from the door. The boys gasped at the woman who entered.

"Kaa-san?" questioned Tohma quietly. Seguchi Natsumi smiled and turned to Ryuichi.

"Sakuma-san, how would you like to come live with us?" The two boys blinked.

"Honto!" they cried in happiness and Natsumi chuckled at Tohma's rare loss of control.

"Hai," she affirmed. "You two get along so well it would be a shame to split you up and honestly my home is the best for you since I would be able to help you with your condition, Ryuichi." She watched Ryuichi blink before he began chewing on Kumagoro's ear.

"I don't have a condition, na no da," he cried softly. Natsumi sighed and smiled at him.

"Ryu-chan, I would like to speak to Ryuichi now, please." She watched as Ryuichi hesitated a moment before calmly placing Kumagoro on his lap again. "Thank you. Now, Ryuichi, Mitsukage-sama and I have been observing you since you came to the hospital and we believe that you have something known as MPD, Multiple Personality Disorder. Is Ryu-chan the only other person who lives in your head?" Ryuichi nodded slowly and she continued. "Ryuichi, it's okay to admit that this is happening to you. It does not mean that you are bad, or weak. In fact, people with this problem are thought to be the ultimate survivors because they found a new way to function where most would go crazy. I'm not a specialist on this disorder but I can help you if you want it. Even if you don't want help I will still let you live with us and you can be a brother for Tohma." Ryuichi frowned.

"I don't have a disorder," he said defensively. Then he picked up Kumagoro and continued in a more childlike voice. "But I do want to stay with Tohma." Tohma smiled in understanding and looked to his mother pleadingly. Natsumi smiled reassuringly.

"That's fine then. Let's go home boys."

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END FLASHBACK

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"At that time," he said quietly. "I could barely acknowledge the fact that I had a problem. I may never be cured, and to some strange extent I don't even want to be, but I need to find a way to at least better control the effects. Yuki-san may be your brother-in-law but imagine if my slip in front of him had happened in a press conference. The transitions may be accepted as an eccentric quirk but arguing with yourself is still a bad sign. Understanding my condition better may be the key to accomplishing that goal." Tohma nodded with a determined glint.

"If this is the path that you wish to take, Ryuichi, then we can do no other than support you. Just know that we, your true family, are here for you. Remember no matter what, ne?" Ryuichi stared at him hard for a moment and then...

"Kumagoro Beam!" The pink plushy bounced off of Tohma's head and into his waiting arms. The four laughed merrily. No further words were needed.

The End

That's it for this story. I'm working on another where Shuichi is forced to go back to high school for a month to earn his diploma. It may be a multi-chapter fic. Check this summary out:

Shindou Shuichi's parents have put their foots down: If Shuichi wants to tour Japan then he will have to finish High School. Pressing deadlines and nosey, lovesick classmates abound. Can our favorite rock star go back to school amid the cameras of the press and the pressures of his job? To bad that Hiro already got his GED. It looks like he's going it alone this time.

ETA will be about a week or two so look forward to it. And remember REVIEW!


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